Post Disclaimer: I cannot stand when people post about their work-outs. So please realize this post is not an attempt to brag about how physically fit, or unfit I am.
I'll leave it at that.
You've seen them before.
They appear unnaturally healthy, happy, successful, and in complete control of everything around them, especially their dogs.
Yes, I'm referring to women who run with dogs.
This is me.
Kidding. Just kidding.
Can't really photograph myself while running with a dog.
And even if I could, I'd look way more annoyed and frightened than this woman looks.
For starters, I run on loose gravel. And to be completely honest I've slipped and fallen walking on this gravel more than once without being attached to a leash.
When our little tyrannosaurus rex came along (aka Jasper), it just so happened his breed requires lots of exercise.
Oh perfect, I thought.
I'll run with him!
I've dabbled in running/jogging/trotting throughout my entire life. Yet just recently reached a point where I feel 'clunky' when my body moves in a jogging motion. I imagine the Tin Man in Wizard of Oz without his oil can. Add to that a jank hip that doesn't do well with long car rides or sitting for that matter, a calf muscle I somehow strained running up the driveway this week, and a bladder that requires a constant kegal focus when running to prevent leaks.
Jasper LOVES going for runs. The only problem is he yanks to the point I can hear him gasping and gagging through my noise-canceling air pods as I feel him propel my clanky body forward. I've never actually heard a death rattle but the depths of these gasps can't be far off. And what is his goal? To show me how slow I am? To test my endurance? To get some negative energy out?
Nope.
It's strictly an attempt to catch up with Goose (non-leashed dog) so he can jump on his back and chew the top of his neck... while moving forward.
I don't really get it either.
So not only do I have my own instability factoring into the running equation, but now I have a dominance-confused K9 forcing me into strides my body is not capable of handling.
All those focussed kegals: gone. There's definite moisture.
That tampon using gravity's advantage to work its way out hands-free: done.
The ability to 'tuck that turtle back in its shell' when the urge to poop comes on: nope.
Sometimes when I run, my mind runs too. And I wonder what would happen if I disappeared with no trace of my body to be found.
Did I mention I love true-crime podcasts?
My mind doesn't wander too far, because, like Jasper, I leave DNA all over my route. I don't even plan it.
That turtle head can only stay tucked so long before freedom rings.
This, along with other reasons is why I LOVE low-traffic gravel roads.
Lots of ditches.
Lots of areas 'tucked away.'
Lots of weeds and shrubbery.
I'll stop there.
This little fellow likes to leave his mark as well.
So I guess we've got that in common.
A super- HOT day I couldn't get the boys' out of the ditch 1-1/2 miles into our jog.
Have I mentioned he's a frisbee dog?
He may be a pain in butt most days, but perhaps that's what makes him fit in so well.
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