Fairy Gardens

My girls love crafts.  Soon enough they'll be glued to Pinterest, but until then I do what I can to satisfy their crafting urges.  The kids have been fighting like wild wolves this week and I realized it was time for an intervention.  The answer was clear.  We needed a craft. 

 

I gathered my crafting supplies in a big bag, made a list of things to make and dove in head first.  We painted wood, rocks and paper, we glued popsicle sticks and pebbles, we dug in the dirt, collected nature supplies and picked raspberries and turnips.  I'm happy to report the fighting was at a minimum today.  Ironically, Ross doesn't like crafts.  Therefore, while the girls crafted, Ross kept busy cracking geodes, cutting pallets apart with a jigsaw to build a fort, helping track down the dogs and shooting frogs in the creek with his bb gun.  Perhaps the answer wasn't so much about 'crafting' as it was 'separation'. 

 

Either way, I'm counting it as a win.

 

Enjoy the photos of the girls building their fairy gardens.  Meanwhile, I'll be scanning Pinterest for a way to use up some turnips.

 

 

 

 

Mock Milkbones and Turtle Carcasses

The dogs are gonna need lots of training.  They've ran off twice (once while wearing their shock collars).  We obviously haven't mastered the technique of training quite yet and have concluded we suck at dog training.  Regardless, dog training requires lots and lots of treats.  Milkbones average $4 a box.  A box!  Well, It just so happens, I don't suck at dog treat making. 

 

 

In fact, I've become obsessed with it.

 

 

The boys can sit, lay down and are in the beginning stages of heel.  They also like my mock Milkbones. 

Maverick contemplates swinging, but decides against it when he discovers what Goose found.

It's a turtle carcass.  Mike shot it in the pond when he feared it was killing his fish.  It took nearly 2 weeks to surface in the pond and I heard the smell was raunchy.  He later learned turtles are not harmful to fish.  Go figure.

They chew on it, tear at it and growl over it.  I don't believe Petco sells turtle carcasses, but the concept might be something to pursue.

All he wants is a teeny-tiny piece of dried up turtle.  If only Goose weren't so possessive.

Got it.

 

But don't even think about taking anymore.  Finders keepers.

 

"I believe I swallowed a bone"

Just a little inside joke for the Green family. 

 

Now if you'll excuse me, I have dog treats to bake.

 

 

What Grizzly Taught Me

We took the kids horseback riding.  Not the kind of horseback riding where you sit atop a horse and go in circles. This was trail riding... no ropes, no trainer, no seatbelts and no arena. 

 

Maisie rode a horse named Utah, Ross rode Tiger and Mike rode Ace.  Since Molly was too little to ride a horse of her own (thank God), she and I rode together.  Our horse was enormous, black, old and a slightly on the gnarly side.  Appropriately, his name was Grizzly. 

 

I'm not gonna lie, I was terrified.  The sheer height of being on such a massive animal was enough to make my knees wobbly.  Not to mention my baby was squished onto the saddle with me... holding onto nothing but the saddle horn.  As her tennis shoes dug into my shins with each of Grizzly's steps, I nervously tried to keep her centered on the horse, occasionally pulling up on the reins to keep Grizzly from getting too close to Mike's horse Ace, who rode directly in front of us.  Meanwhile, Maisie confidently lead the pack.   

 

At that moment, it became clear... my kids are growing up.

 

Suddenly and out of nowhere, Grizzly got spooked by a deer.  Terror.  Pure terror ran though me.  As I sat atop a spooked horse, I watched ahead of me as Ace, Tiger and Utah bucked up and made nervous horse sounds as they shuffled around in the dirt.  After a moment, my heart regained normal rhythm, the horses relaxed and were soon realigned back on the path. 

 

During the 3 mile ride, Ross' horse pooped, Maisie's peed and apparently had a gas issue as Ross and Maisie found this hilarious. 

 

I was just beginning to relax and enjoy the ride when we were instructed to 'trot'.  Huh?  Before I could object, all the horses began trotting.  I didn't even have to kick Grizzly in the side to make him start.  He seemed to know the routine.   I was now bopping up and down on a horse (Molly bopping on top of my bops) as I gripped ahold of Mollys' forearms with one hand while holding the reins with the other.  I thank my inherited Claussen arm strength for being able to pull off that feat.

 

I couldn't wait for the ride to end and embrace safety.  However, Mollys squeals of joy combined with Ross, Maisie and Mikes laughter and genuine smiles while 'trotting' had me wishing this ride would never end.  Those were my people.  And my people were happy and loving the ride.  

 

Therefore, so was I.

 

With that,  I've concluded everything I've ever needed to know about motherhood, I learned from atop a gnarly horse named Grizzly.

 

1.  You don't always get what you expect.

2.  Kids are capable of accomplishing things way before you think they're ready.

3.  Old isn't necessarily bad.   

5.  Put your trust and faith in a power much larger than yourself.  Most things aren't up to us anyway.

6.  Everyone poops and all kids (including husbands) will find bathroom humor hilarious.  It's just the way it is.  Accept it and move on.

7.  As cautious as you are, things will happen and once in a while you'll get spooked.  It's a bump in the road, take a breath, realign and continue the ride.  Things have a way of smoothing out.

8.  Never, ever, ever underestimate your strength when it comes to your kids.

9.  Sometimes things will move faster than you're ready for.  Just hold on tight, keep calm and confident.  You're the mom... you've got this.

3.  You must let go of the fear, the what if's, the unknowns.  Let go, relax and enjoy the ride.  Everyone else is.

 

I have no photos from the actual ride.  For obvious reasons. 

Enjoy a couple lake photos instead.

 

 

 

A Place at the Lake

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you're lucky enough to have a place at the lake...

you're lucky enough.

 

 

Eagle River Day 1

We left before the sun came up.  We imagined we'd carry each of our sleeping children to the van in their pajamas and they'd sleep several hours in the car.  Lets just say the kids were wide awake before our alarm went off and they actually watched an episode of Disney's "Jesse" while Mike and I finished packing the car in the dark.  Go figure.

 

Overheard within the past 36 hours...

 

It was 4:30 a.m when I heard, "I just saw a rainbow in the sky!"

 

Inside a gas station in Mason City, "This donut looks like a huge cow turd."

 

As we drove past a field, "Mom, I just saw a guy hanging in that field the same way Jesus died!"

 

3:30 a.m. after Molly peed the bed. 

"It smells like death in here." 

"I feel like I was punched in the eye." 

"I'm naked and afraid."

 

And with that, I'll leave you with photos.

Donn and Mike

 

Aunt Nickie got stuck in the paddle boat.

 

Betcha didn't know Wisconsin had monkeys.

 

 

 

 

 

Maisie and Oliver discuss life at Eagle River.

 

 

Meanwhile, I feel more relaxed than humanly possible and am starting to wonder if I've been drugged. 

I swear it has nothing to do with the Razz-A-Ritas either.

 

Gifts of Summer

Each summer comes with its own set of gifts.  Gifts which are are unknown until we're in the thick of summer.  Gifts which are everchanging as the kids' interests, as do ours, change. 

Last summer was filled with basketball, babydolls, house showings, a career change, an Under Armour obsession, ballet, roller skates, bike riding and trips to the pool.

 

This summer were on a mission to make unpoppable bubbles. 
Glycerin was supposed to do the trick, but were still working on it.

Did you know you can use the top of a Gatorade bottle as a bubble blower? 

 

Maisie's found a soft spot in her heart for those crazy dogs of ours.

 

 

 

I'm guessing the feeling's mutual.

 

Ross' passion for nature and wildlife is exploding this summer.  His sheer interest, curiousity and respect for nature make me certain this boy is part Indian.

 

Turns out to be an Eastern Milk Snake.  After researching the reptile, it was discovered to be non-poisonous. 

 

 

Therefore, Ross let it bite him twice.  He wanted to know what a snake bite felt like. 

Not to worry, I have an essential oil for that.

 

I am not skilled to know what the rest of this summer will bring, what next summer or the summer after that will be like. 

 

But I know for sure it will not stay the same. 

Nothing does.

 

Therefore, I'm planning to soak up as much of it as I can.

 

 The secret to having it all... is knowing you already do.

 

Sayonara

Castrate

Sterilize

Change

Desexualize

Fix

Unsex

Make Barren

Infertile

Sexless

Neuter

 

Sayonara Suckers

Missing My Kitchen and Sloppy Joes

I miss my old kitchen.  I've always had a thing for working in the kitchen, however I've come to realize that for me, cooking is nothing short of therapy. 

 

It's been a challenging week.  The kids seem tired and cranky, I seem tired and cranky, Mike and I ended our 4-month-long Breaking Bad Netflix marathon, our dogs lives were recently threatened by a future neighbor who claimed Goose ate his chicken, (I only wish I were kidding) Molly's having night terrors, I'm saturated in essential oils, feel bloated, hate my hair and we have ants. 

 

Have I mentioned my kitchen sucks?  I have a 1-foot section of counter space which I do the majority of my cooking on.  Sometimes I resort to doing my prep work on the burners for lack of space.  I try to think about the life of Caroline Ingalls and realize I'm just spoiled.  For crying out loud, she raised 4 girls, one who was blind, plus she took in poor Albert when Charles found him walking the streets of Sleepy Hollow.  Additionally, she did it all prior to wash machines, mini vans, Duncan Donuts coffee and Pinterest. 

 

Regardless, my kitchen still sucks.

 

Thursday I was at my wits end.  I can't tell you how many times I heard, "I just goed poop and it was a big one", "I peed in my pants", "Molly put a ponytail holder on the cats ear and he scratched her", "I keep having to turn this dang show up because you guys can't shut your holes."  The word 'dick' kept showing up on Maisie's easel, Molly kept talking about going to Bisconsin next week and also claimed to hate spicy tornados (tomatoes). 

 

I'll be the first to admit they were getting to me.  Then I started cooking.  I don't know where the idea stemmed from, but I'm grateful for it.  I submerged myself in making homemade mac and cheese, 2 lbs of sloppy joe meat, 5 quarts of cabbage soup, cookies and sun tea.  Suddenly, just as the cheese began to melt into my white sauce, so did my headache.  Just as my patience was growing thinner than my hair, I felt it start to surge.  Call it my new "Stress Away" essential oil, call it taking a break from the kids, call it a hallucination; I'm come to the conclusion cooking is my drug and I'd been in withdrawl. 

 

I'd like to take this moment to mention I still hate my kitchen.

 

So with that, I'm leaving you with my Sloppy Joe recipe.  Maisie ate 3/4 lb for lunch last week.  Just sayin'...

 

Sloppy Joes (this stuff's like crack, I'd double it)

 

1 lb ground beef

1/4 cup chopped onion

1/2 tsp garlic powder

1 tsp yellow mustard

3/4 cup ketchup (that's not a typo)

3 tsp brown sugar

 

Brown the meat.  I always rinse and drain under hot water.

Return meat to skillet.  Add onion, garlic powder, mustard, ketchup and brown sugar.  Simmer until heated through. 

Serve on bakery buns with sliced cheese and pickles.

 

Your welcome.

The Babysitter

We hired a babysitter for a couple hours.

Maisie wanted to dress up before the babysitter arrived. 

 

I can't decide what I like best.  The huge dress, the sock-stuffed bra, the fact that she's wearing a bra, the scarf, or the fact that she posed on the vacuum cord.

 

Oh, what the babysitter must have been thinking. 

Pond Party 2014

Click the link for the Pond Party Slideshow!

 

Pond Party 2014

Walls

We've got walls!